"Love is Not Rude"

Yesterday was a good day. I kept in mind being thoughtful all day. However, my husband didn't come up to bed until around 2am, so he found his pillow and toothbrush outside the bedroom door. This is one of my boundaries if he comes to bed after midnight. I'm not sure how this falls in with being thoughtful. Something for me to think about.

Day 5 Dare:

Ask your spouse to tell you three things that cause him or her to be uncomfortable or irritated with you. You must do so without attacking them or justifying your behavior. This is from their perspective only.

I asked him and so far he has given me only one thing. He is tired so he needs to think about it. He hates it when I say I don't need anything when he asks, because I don't want him to spend money on me. So this is something I can change. It will be interesting to see what else he comes up with.

The book "The Love Dare" has three questions we can ask ourselves to help us see where we need to improve.

1. How does your spouse feel about the way you speak and act around them?
2. How does your behavior affect your mate's sense of worth and self-esteem?
3. Would your husband or wife say you're a blessing, or that you're condescending and embarrassing?

I think these are great questions to ask ourselves about how we interact with anybody. Basically it boils down to are we being Christlike. I have a long way to go.

Love is Thoughtful

Today's Dare:

Contact your spouse sometime during the business of the day. Have no agenda other than asking how he or she is doing and if there is anything you could do for them.

This is easy enough. One thing about being thoughtful is to take the time to think about them and what they like and need. When we were dating they were pretty much all we thought about in a good way. With the addiction we kind of think about them, but about their weaknesses. So today I'm going to focus on the positive things about my husband and how I can get to know him better. He thinks differently than I do so I will embrace it today and not cringe at it. Today will be a great day.