Personal Relationships

Be careful what you pray for you might get it. I've been praying to be shown all my character weaknesses so I can work on eliminating them. So what has happened? I've been shown some of my character weaknesses. Mercifully, not all at once. Seeing my flaws is not what I would call a good time. But it was what I wanted right? Maybe? So I am making some progress on Step Four. As for being more regular on my blog I  haven't been so good. Since the weather has been nice I've needed to be in the yard pulling my lovely weeds and my husband has been working from home which always throws me for a loop. I'm glad this month is almost over. I'm hoping May will be better. So on to Step Four.

Evaluating Our Personal Relationships.
This week I've decided that I hardly know who my husband really is. He has hidden so much of himself from me and still does, that when I discover things I feel like I've been sharing my life with a complete stranger. I wonder if I will ever really know him? Being the co-dependent that I am, doing Step Four helps me to evaluate how my emotions  control my thoughts relative to my relationships with members of my family and others. If I notice a pattern of fear, negative thinking etc. I can work on changing it. I used to drive myself crazy with some of my negative thinking. I'm getting better, but this week I realized I still have a ways to go. The guide offers some questions to help.

1. Do I mainly focus on the behaviors of others?
2. Do I try to rescue others from the consequences of their addictive behavior?
3. Do I seek to point out the faults of others in order to control them or to make myself feel better?
4. Are any of these behaviors linked to unresolved issues from my past?
5. Where have I let self-will (wanting things to turn out the way I was sure would be best) take over and drive me to  be controlling and maybe even cruel or abusive to another person?
6. Where have I let self-pity overcome me with despair? Do I allow myself to create victim thinking patterns and blame others for my current state of unhappiness?
7. Where and when have I acted or even just felt self-righteous towards another?
8. What thoughts and feelings of judgment concerning others increase feelings of resentment?
9. What thoughts and emotions concerning the behaviors of others has been the source of my desire to fix and control someone else?
10. What situations in my life have I allowed to control me and my peace because of the way I have reacted towards others?

Wow, these are great thought provoking questions. Now I have even more to think about as I go pull weeds. Have a great day!